Dying to Self

 

I’ve always been a “why” person.

 

I remember sitting in the library at Spring Arbor while in college and finding one of the books written by BT Roberts that explained why we dressed plainly, why our churches were simple, etc. It was to be inviting to the poor. So that all would feel comfortable in our churches and with our people. It was because we were putting others before ourselves. As a Sociology major ministering to inner city teenagers at the time, I was thrilled to find this amazing history of my denomination.

 

As I see it, I grew up towards the end of the extreme legalism era. Thankfully my parents were people who simply loved Jesus and wanted others to love Him as well. Interestingly, a pivotal moment in my teenage years as it relates to my parents and the church was when I asked if I could get my ears pierced. I will never forget my parents’ response. They said, “Let us think about it and get back to you.” When we revisited the topic, they said frankly, “There are people in our church who believe that Christians should not wear a lot of jewelry. If we were to allow you to get your ears pierced it would cause a problem with those people. We don’t believe that it is a matter of salvation but for the sake of our position of leadership we don’t feel like we can give you permission to do that.” I was very disappointed and of course annoyed that people thought that way. But I appreciated my parents’ honesty.

And in retrospect, I think my parents modeled the same principle that BT Roberts set forth long before. We make choices about our behavior and lifestyles for the sake of others. A true friend lays down her life for her friends. We often read this only as it applies to dying for someone else. But maybe it is far simpler than that—choosing not to do something that we would otherwise have no problem with simply for the sake of another.

And isn’t this perhaps what sanctification is about? Dying to self. It seems that our churches and our culture could use a little of this teaching and practice. I don’t believe in rules for the sake of rules. When I turned 17, I got my ears pierced. No one left the church and eventually they even ordained me, ears pierced and all. Now there are other things I refrain from doing and things that I do that I don’t particularly enjoy. Why? I’ve been crucified with Christ. I become all things to all people that I might invite others to join me in letting Christ live in me.

Thank you BT Roberts for founding a church with that principle and practice. Thank you Mom and Dad for continually modeling it for me.

--Joanna DeWolf

Comments

[WICK]

I wonder if I could use this same approach as to why I'd rather wear flip flops than nice fancy dress shoes on Sunday mornings.

[WICK]

I wonder if I could use this same approach as to why I'd rather wear flip flops than nice fancy dress shoes on Sunday mornings.

[WICK]

oh wait...that's self. -ish

Is a happy medium finding dressy shoes that don't look expensive?

(what IS the male equivalent issue for church apparel? Did BT Roberts ever take issue with suits/ties?)

[Kathy Callahan-Howell]

I don't know about BT Roberts, but at some point holiness people didn't wear ties, that was excessive adornment. Funny since now it's the thing to do.

Joanna, thanks for reminding us that our choices came from the root of putting others before self. That's a great standard that crosses all lines of culture and generation.

Kathy Callahan-Howell